LGBT Pride in New York: a change of perception
Despite being a member of the LGBT community, I have felt for a long while that LGBT Pride is a farcical event. Reading media reports on the various Pride events around the world for a number of years, I – and many people I know – have felt that Pride in fact does a discredit to the LGBT community.
For a number of years I believed that Pride was a somewhat meaningless party during which LGBT individuals dressed up in bizarre outfits and conclusively labeled themselves as ‘freaks’, further creating distance and marginalization from mainstream society.
Obviously this perception was informed by the media, which often seems to select photos that isolate individuals in particularly creative attire in order to illustrate them as ‘freaks’. It was also probably influenced by a fair amount of self-directed internalized homophobia and jealously that so many people across the world were sufficiently strong and proud of an integral part of themselves that defines them as ‘other’. But that's a whole different issue. This was also the view of many gay South Africans in whose company I found myself, pointing to the fact that this jaded view of Pride may be a result of the underfunded and relatively insignificant event that is Pride in South Africa.
I was certainly a proponent of the idea that Pride – if it could be proven that it was a protest and not just a party of freaks – was only relevant in countries where the rights of LGBT individuals were not recognized. For me, in South Africa where the rights of LGBTI individuals are enshrined in the constitution and same-sex marriage is legal, it seemed to me that this event was somewhat redundant and just an excuse for a party.
When I was living in Berkeley last year, a close friend of mine – who is a quintessential San Franciscan, in that she makes most progressive/liberal individuals seem like tea-party members – told me that I should reconsider my view of Pride. Her view surprised me because it was fairly 'conventional' by the standards of crazy liberals. Her argument was that LGBT individuals should have a space to openly and publicly celebrate themselves and their 'otherness' in a forum in which they are the majority, even if it’s once a year. She sees it as a protest against government – particularly in the US, demanding marriage equality etc. – but also a protest against convention and the perception that it’s ‘okay’ for people to be gay providing ‘they don’t shove it down our throats’. Sound familiar?
This very wise friend of mine emphatically told me that one should not underestimate the importance for marginalized peoples (who, whichever way we look at it, LGBT individuals are to a large extent) to feel free to express themselves – even be it in an over-the-top way – and feel like part of accepted group. Although I fully respected her opinion, I listened with a level of skepticism (on a side-note, the SAWIP team have come to realize that this cynicism is one of my less desirable character traits). I understood her and to an extent agreed that it was important for those who are ‘othered’ to feel less marginalized.
I maintained, however, that a large street party/parade at which people dressed up in bizarre variations of the rainbow flag, and others in strange variations of drag, was not necessarily this forum. I did promise that one day I would attend a Pride parade to see it for myself because, like so many opinions we form, this was based on theoretical understanding and not experience. There is a lot to be said for experience.
Two weeks ago, I finally experienced a real Pride celebration - in New York with over a million other people. And as much as I hate to admit it, I was so horribly wrong about Pride. I will repeat: horribly wrong. Genuinely, it was one of the most incredible celebrations of my life.
Firstly, Pride is much more than just a single street party. New York Pride, for instance, is a week long and involves numerous celebrations, dialogues and community activist events that culminate in the sunday Pride parade. Pride month in the US is celebrated in recognition of the Stonewall riots of 1969 which informed much of the LGBT rights movement in the US and across the world. The event is a protest; it's a celebration; it's an occasion on which people, corporations and groups - religious and otherwise - express their support for LGBT individuals; it is an event of community, where political and entertainment figures become role models in the LGBT rights movement. Essentially, it's a day of happiness, where people are gay, if you'll pardon the pun.
Towards the end of the 5 hour parade, Lady Gaga’s Born This Way blasted through the streets of one of the most amazing cities in the world and people in various forms of dress and undress, danced and sung and kissed and hugged and screamed and waved protest signs and rainbow flags. At that moment, I realized just how enormously happy my heart was. This was because, for once, I felt like being ‘out’ and ‘open’ about my sexuality for once didn’t place me in the minority. And I was ecstatic because the people around me, the same people society marginalizes on a daily basis, were enormously and spectacularly happy.
And I must mention that for the occasion, I donned a bit of crazy. My SAWIP teammates were most concerned about what I was going to wear. And I'm happy to report that my outfit was complete with rainbow feather wings and a rainbow feather boa.
I have had to review my opinion of Pride radically. I can see its relevance across the world, both in countries that recognize LGBT rights and those that don't. In South Africa I in fact think it is even more vital and relevant than in others. Although we have constitutional recognition of LGBT rights, we lack the support of many individuals and communities. For so many people who continue to be marginalized in South Africa because of their sexual orientation, a day of being in a group majority and feeling empowered is a necessity.
Thank you to my wonderful SAWIP friends for not once making me feel like I was that ‘freak’ for wanting to go to Pride; to the deities of the SAWIP curriculum for ensuring that Sunday, June 24th was a free day; and to the circumstances I have been fortunate its enough to find myself in, that I have the ability to openly express and celebrate my sexual orientation, sexuality and entirety of my identity – even the parts that societally define me as an ‘other’.






